Ed Asner

 
Grew up in the only Jewish family in his neighborhood. Not many people realize that back in the days when Asner was taller vertically than horizontally, he was quite a good athlete. He possessed the rare double threat of being able to whip other boys in either sports or accounting. Later, he was twice elected president of the Screen Actors Guild, and expressed opposition to our government's involvement in Central America. Unfortunately, half of the members of the SAG thought he was talking about Nebraska. He was later replaced as SAG president by Charleton Heston, most likely at gunpoint and while Asner was standing in a pool of his own urine.

Quote: "They're sheep. They like him (Bush) enough to credit him with saving the nation after 9/11. Three thousand people get killed, and everybody thinks they're next on the list. The president comes along, and he's got his six-guns strapped on, and people think he's going to save them."

Anti-Quote: If we're sheep, I'm less concerned with Bush, and more concerned with why the likes of Asner wear wool coats.

Pluses: Fathered a child at the age of 58, giving hope of virility to bald, fat, left wing geezers with excessive body hair everywhere. You just know that women must yell out "OH MR. GRAAAAAANNNTT!" when they're doing it. Must get on his nerves, but we think it's funny, and that's all that matters.

Minuses: When liberals get old, they stop being idealistic, and it just gets really pathetic and sad. It's kind of like skinny people over the age of 60, you stop looking healthy, and start looking like you have cancer.

Rating: Looks too much like that mutant at the end of Weird Science to be watched for any length of time. "S" = Medium

Fun Fact: Asner's back was used by CIA operatives to conduct Rogaine experiments in the early 60's.



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