Janeane Garofalo

The non-conforming, cynical actress/comedienne has been trying her hand at conformity lately, fitting nicely into the Hollywood mold of being a pest about something she knows nothing about.

Quote: "There is no evidence of weapons of mass destruction in Iraq."

Anti-quote: That's the perk of being a celebrity. You get an advance copy of Sean Penn's report.

Pluses: Courageous enough to leave Saturday Night Live in '94, with the guts to say that the show had dropped in quality (ironically, the show got funnier after she left). Kind of cute after a few beers, but only if the one doing the drinking is Rosie O'Donnell.

Minuses: Introspective people who are only 5"1' are annoying at best. Deep self-examination works best tall. Short people only reach the top if they're wise and don't whine, as evidenced by Mother Teresa, Voltaire, the Dalai Lama, Yoda, Ghandi, Immanuel Kant, and Pat Benatar.

Rating: Too much angst, not enough substance, but at least she means it, and best of all, she's harmless. "S" = Low

Fun fact: "Garofalo" is also a zoology term for what is conceived after a giraffe and a buffalo mate.

Back to "The list" at Celebrity Dossier